And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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