I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize