everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
