Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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