I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize