It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
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