I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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