I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
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