i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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