I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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