is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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