How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
