I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Randomize
