hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
