yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize