I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Randomize