weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.