bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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