Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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