Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(410): View more from Maryland

he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.

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(410): he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE. http://tfl.nu/pbaf

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(201): View more from New Jersey

we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer

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(201): we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer http://tfl.nu/68pg

Replies (39) Good night (2666) Bad night (543)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo

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(610): Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo http://tfl.nu/aw10

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(919): View more from North Carolina

dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple

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(919): dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple http://tfl.nu/sgcu

Replies (61) Good night (983) Bad night (6458)
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(815): View more from Illinois

I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!

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(815): I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico! http://tfl.nu/4kc0

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list

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(413): She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list http://tfl.nu/8owq

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(619): View more from California

there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly

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(619): there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly http://tfl.nu/smco

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(479): View more from Arkansas

I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.

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(479): I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke. http://tfl.nu/g10c

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(417): View more from Missouri

Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.

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(417): Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go. http://tfl.nu/8zsf

Replies (15) Good night (1979) Bad night (670)
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(312): View more from Illinois

It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.

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(312): It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over. http://tfl.nu/eihc

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.

(1-704): View more from North Carolina

Celebratory bar crawl?

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(704): Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends. (1-704): Celebratory bar crawl? http://tfl.nu/s5bh

Replies (1) Good night (957) Bad night (299)
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(313): View more from Michigan

I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs

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(313): I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs http://tfl.nu/01r5

Replies (4) Good night (432) Bad night (987)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick

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(336): At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick http://tfl.nu/8ojw

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(720): View more from Colorado

Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.

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(720): Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate. http://tfl.nu/0wwt

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(619): View more from California

Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.

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(619): Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman. http://tfl.nu/nljs

Replies (5) Good night (185) Bad night (502)

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