Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
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