Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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