I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize