it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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