it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
