Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I smell like Dick and happiness
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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