just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Randomize
