those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
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