I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize