seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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