Plan B is the new Plan A
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
