we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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