Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize