My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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