Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Randomize