Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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