Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
The power of my boobs compel you
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Randomize