Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
