Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
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