She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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