I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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