id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize