He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
we made out on top of his cat.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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