I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
