are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
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