Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
