WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I think your dad took our porno
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize