Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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