No period for spring break; use this wisely.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
