put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize