you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Randomize
