is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
