so that wasnt chicken after all
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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