Don't you send me to vm
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
